carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
He told me I look like a librarian today. I hope that means he has a librarian fetish or something
Disregard. He says he said I look "agrarian" today and just proceeded to compare me to Mumford and Sons. Fuck it, I'm going home and drinking
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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