i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
Randomize
