Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
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