Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?
I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
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