I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
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