just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years.
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
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