Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
she smelled like a LAN party
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
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