I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
Randomize
