Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
I bet he’d be surprised by the epic blow job he’d get if he stopped talking about his wife long enough for me to get in the mood
Randomize
