So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
There's a walmart bag of my vomit outside my front door. I just really need someone to appreciate that with me.
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
I think we might need a safe word for this...
Randomize
