oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Randomize