i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
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