Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
So, the officer that worked my wreck, I'm rockin his world tonight. He saw me high on morphine in the ER. So he knows my level of crazy. Think he'll agree to wear his gun?
So many things can go wrong tonight.
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Randomize
