Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
Randomize
