dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
Randomize
