Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
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