i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
