Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
Randomize
