i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Randomize
