I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
Randomize