I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
Randomize
