Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
the room spins SO much faster in panama
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
ETA 20 minutes and if you greet me at the door with a gin & tonic I’ll give you head.
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
Randomize
