did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
Randomize