Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
it's like iHOP with fire
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
