We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
are you so shy because you have an std?
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
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