I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Randomize
