Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
