You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
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