i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
Randomize