Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
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