Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
Randomize