they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
I need mimosas to revive my soul
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
