Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
What's grosser: using a dirty sex towel as an oven mitt? or using the oven to reheat superbowl bean dip for dinner?
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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