his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
There's a naked man in my car right now.
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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