how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
I yelled at your uterus for you.
Randomize
