doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
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