Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
Dating a girl 4 years younger than you is like living in a Taylor Swift song...
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
Randomize
