That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
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