He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
It was awkward being the only one at the wedding who knows that the bride and groom met when she gave him a lap dance at a strip club
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
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