margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
I spent part of my valentines extracting candy hearts from a woman's vagina. The entire time I was thinking "this job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes."
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
