We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
Randomize
