Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
I wish life had little blips of pornography
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
Sorry about my sloppy drunk texts. I'm not sure talking about banging a near dead Jimmy Stewart was my finest moment
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
They left me at home... I'm a liability
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
Randomize
