I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
Randomize
