Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
You okay?
I walked into work with a banana and a loaf of bread
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Bro, I live in a constant state of existential dread and moderate ennui. The prospect of cosmic horror doesn’t faze me that much.
Randomize