i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
Randomize
