Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
