at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
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