Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
Randomize