So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
MIDGETS
????
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
Randomize
