Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
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